In this statutory episode, Laurie Gilbertson, Founder and CEO of Tribeca Blue Consulting, shares her experiences in front of judges, juries, and live television audiences to help clients and their businesses maximize each speaking opportunity.

You will discover:

– How to get feedback on how you communicate

– Why communication is central to a founder’s success in every industry

– Three questions you need to ask before you communicate

Episode Transcript

Scott Ritzheimer

Hello, hello and welcome. Welcome, once again to the secrets of the high demand coach podcast, where we are here with yet another high demand coach. It is the one and only Laurie Gilbertson, who is a former New York City Attorney in the sex crimes and organized crime as a prosecutor. Actually, she’s also a television legal analyst and educator and an entrepreneur as founder of Tribeca blue consulting, Laurie helps entrepreneurs, executives and attorneys to craft and present engaging and persuasive narratives clearly and confidently in the courtroom, the boardroom and in the media. Well, Laurie, I’m super excited about this episode. I love I love breaking down what great communication is, particularly in the area of storytelling. So I’m really excited to explore that with you. I’m wondering if we could just to kind of set things up here we have a question out of the gate, and that is looking back at it now through the lens of a Communication Coach. How did your personal communication skill and style change over your time as an attorney?

Laurie Gilbertson

Wow. Thanks so much for having me. Scott, it’s great to be here. I’m excited for this conversation. Yeah. So, you know, my very first day as a criminal prosecutor in New York City, I was sitting in the back row of a courtroom, and as I’m watching, you know, what’s going on in court, so I can kind of learn and, you know, absorb and take things in. One of my supervisors walked up to me, handed me a big folder and said, Your trial starts after lunch. Your witnesses are in the front row. Good luck. That’s how my advocacy and my communication skills started. So I have to say, I would not want to ever replay that. I thank goodness that there is nothing that has ever recorded that trial and afterwards, the judge, who actually became a close friend for my next 10 years in the DAs office, looked at me and said, counselor, can I speak with you? And we had a conversation. He said, I just want to let you know everything you did wrong. Yep, so that is really how it started for me. I got the best on the job training that you could possibly get for communication. And what that really is it was being on the ground every single day, being in court, talking with witnesses, talking with judges, trying to persuade juries. And as you say, with storytelling, taking all these facts, taking these great, not sometimes good facts, sometimes not in terms of persuading a jury, but taking these stories that were coming to me and really weaving them into a way that could persuade a jury or a judge. And I didn’t realize at the time the kind of communication skills I was honing. I just wanted to be a good trial lawyer. I just want to learn from the best. I just wanted to figure out how to how to have my witnesses tell stories, you know, how could I ask them great questions? How could I listen and make their stories really relatable to a jury? I was learning how to talk to jurors. You know, I am from Bethesda, Maryland, right outside of Washington, DC. I grew up in a suburb there, and here I am in the middle of New York City, you know, talking to people who have incredibly different life experiences than I did, and really trying to learn how do I relate to all different people, so that they trust me, so I have credibility, so they listen to me. And I did that for 10 years, and not even realizing really what I was doing. So gathered those skills worked on television where it was a different ballgame, really different medium, learning how to really get things into these very short, tight kind of sound bites that were educational and entertaining, right? Because that’s what TV is all about. So I really, you know, hold, continue to hone those skills, also without realizing it, because it just came very naturally that was my job. That’s what I needed to do. And it wasn’t until I started my company and I really sat down to analyze, like, what makes this work, that I realized how my my communication skills had changed from that very first day of getting up in front of a judge and doing this trial to the time where I felt really comfortable getting up in front of people and teaching them what these skills actually were. And I think what really changed for me was figuring out what made it work, what made it compelling, what made it impactful, and then really honing in on that myself and trying to really do better with those things. And you know, as hard as it is, and I don’t know if you watch yourself or listen to yourself with these podcasts or other things, it is right. It’s the worst. But, you know, I try to do it. I encourage all my clients to do it. There’s nothing better than. Listening to yourself and watching yourself, there’s there’s nothing worse for like that cringe factor, as my teenagers would say, There’s nothing better for improvement, really. So as painful as it is, I encourage everyone to do it, and it wasn’t until I started to do that, I saw my weaknesses, right? Like I used to be on podcasts I would watch, and I would kind of go like this, and for your listeners, I’m kind of rocking back and forth in my chair. And I was like, well, that’s distracting. That’s terrible. So I now I have a way that I sit, I sit on the edge of my chair. I try to sit up straight. That’s kind of stopped it. So little things like that, I’ve tried to change, and then the big things I’ve tried to hone in on. And, you know, like with anyone, you never fully master it, right? You just keep learning.

Scott Ritzheimer

I think one of the things that I love about your background in the way that you translate it into the world of business as well, is being in a courtroom. You have something that a lot of entrepreneurs don’t have in a lot of contexts where they communicate, and that is like a decision, like a final decision, right? Many times, especially when you’re looking at communicating to your own team, it doesn’t end in like a single jury verdict, right? So it’s a little harder to really assess how well you did as a communicator, or just did you plow through as a boss, right? And so I love that where you form these traits and skills and abilities came out of an environment where you could, you know whether that was intentional or intuitive. You had that feedback coming regularly. Now there’s undoubtedly some folks sitting there thinking, I’m not on TV, I’m not in a courtroom, I’m not recording podcasts. What are the ways outside of those channels that you see founders communicating, and why is it so important that they pay attention to how they communicate in this environment?

Laurie Gilbertson

Founders are, you don’t have to be on a stage, on a podcast, on TV, to really practice your communication and actually, like you said, to maybe try and get some feedback on it. And I start with people completely starting at the beginning, and just think about how you communicate every day, before you even get to your team, before you get to any kind of public area. Think about how you communicate every day, because every time you have a conversation, every time you find yourself telling a story, as we all do during the day, that is kind of a micro communication, that is a place to practice, that’s a place to start getting a sense of how you feel when you say things, and a sense of you know what reaction you’re getting. So it may not be a jury verdict, or it may not be like a TV kind of thing, but you know, we all tell stories. We tell them every single day. And if you think about it, you probably have some stories in your toolbox that that like are your favorite ones. You know that you kind of tell when you’re, you know, with friends or with colleagues or whatever. I know I have some of my favorite merits, and everybody does. And so when you tell them, keep an eye on who’s listening, and are you losing them, right? Are they getting bored? Are they leaning forward? Are they kind of making eye contact? Are they into it? Are you getting a laugh? Are you getting a follow up question? And that gives you a little bit of feedback, and it gives you some practice. And when, as a founder, you’re speaking to maybe investors, and you’re having one on one conversations, or you’re at a networking thing and you have to talk to people, these are great areas of practice. And every kind of communication is some great practice. And it’s the thing that can make it really good. And the thing that can help you get better is that preparation. You know, the greatest speakers, whether it’s off the cuff, it’s at a networking thing, it’s just, you know, sometimes you know you’re sitting around, you’re having a beard or glass of wine, and someone’s telling a story, and you’re like, wow, I am captivated, right? I knew so many people like that when I was a prosecutor, and I used to think, like, I can’t tell stories like that. You know, some people, they just, they pull you in. Those are the people that that prepare and practice. They really are, and the ones that use this kind of communication all the time to get better and better. It’s a skill. It’s like a muscle, right? You’re not gonna, you know, the Olympics are on now, as we record it, right? The gymnasts start with a forward roll, you know, you end up doing then, you know, a back handspring, then you move up to a back flip. Like these are muscles, and we have to continue to practice them to get much better. So there’s all these opportunities, and you can get feedback without it having to be something so definitive as a jury verdict.

Scott Ritzheimer

Yeah. So true. So true. One of the things that I was reminded of as you were talking through that a lot of especially new entrepreneurs, when they’re first crafting their message right, haven’t really honed it yet, maybe great communicators, but it’s a new message, and you kind of have to go through this process again. One of the mistakes that I see them make is to try and go straight to like a written form of communication. In or like a one to many right out of the gate and and think like, well, I can get it to more people, but they they rob themselves of what you just talked about, of seeing the facial expressions of the people that they’re talking to. And you helped me understand why I feel it so important for folks, especially early on, with a message, with a business with an opportunity to go talk one on one to people and hone your message that way, as opposed to trying to do it from data in Instagram likes or something,

Laurie Gilbertson

Yeah. Oh, you know, I think one of the hardest things, the most challenging things as an entrepreneur, is figuring out that kind of really short, you know, three to five sentence initial pitch. That’s that kind of answer to tell me about yourself, right? Or tell me about your company? Yeah. You know, there’s this old quote that’s attributed to Mark Twain, and I’ve been told maybe it’s not him, but, you know, it’s, it’s I wanted you. I wanted to write you a short letter, but I didn’t have time, so I wrote you a long one, right? So it’s hard to to hone this in. It’s hard with stories. It’s hard with any communication. So you got to do the work. And what I would encourage founders to do, and what I did when I was starting out. And just like the that trial story I told, I mean, goodness, it was terrible. I mean, I was a really good communicator, but I didn’t, I couldn’t get it across. I couldn’t quite get it, you know, together, until I kept saying it over and over and saying it to different people and asking, how does this land for you? Does this make sense? Do you understand what I do? I had friends thinking that I was a career counselor. That’s not what I do, but that’s on me, because I wasn’t explaining it, right? So what I encourage founders to do is to, you know, maybe initially, start writing some stuff down, and this is not for public consumption or Instagram likes or anything, but start getting it on the page. You know, who I am, right? Who am I serving, and what value am I really adding to this, you know, what? What do I want people to know? And there’s a framework I use for pretty much every presentation I give, and it’s, what do I want my audience to know, right? It’s this, know, feel and do. What do I want them to know? Right? What? What am I telling them? And then, what do I want them to feel? Right? What emotions do I want them to feel? And then what do I want them to do? What’s that call to action? So it’s a great way for founders to start off kind of figuring out that message right now, I want my clients or anyone I talk to to know that everyone can be a great communicator, and it’s really a matter of just starting to learn and to starting to engage with this tool and all the tools you have. I want them to feel encouraged, you know, inspired. And then, right, what do I want them to do? I want them to just get started. Right, whether it’s hiring a coach like me, whether it’s starting to pay attention to these conversations, want them to, like, seize that and really start, you know, using that powerful tool. So if your founders start doing that, that you know any founder who’s listening, that is a great way to start honing in on that message. And don’t worry if it doesn’t sound right. You know, this is the practice. This is how we get there. It doesn’t like spring from us in this beautiful way, right? The ones that sound so beautiful are the ones that people have really, really worked on and asked for feedback on. And I agree with you, I would not start putting out anything on, you know, Instagram or wherever your medium is of choice until you’ve really gotten there. Doesn’t have to be perfect, but until you’ve kind of gotten there. Because, you know, we talk a lot about, you know, personal branding. These days, we talk a lot about, you know, how you want people to kind of see who you are and what you’re giving and how you’re out there. And if you start doing that right away, you’re just going to confuse the audience. You haven’t done the work yet. You’re not ready to put it out yet. You got to do the work first.

Scott Ritzheimer

So true. Laurie, this is fantastic. There’s a question that I’m dying to know. It’s actually something I ask all my guests. But in this world, communicating founders, entrepreneurs, all this, this that you see on a daily basis, what would you say is the biggest secret that you wish wasn’t a secret at all? What’s that one thing you wish everybody watching and listening today knew?

Laurie Gilbertson

Gosh, you know, I really wish that people would kind of get in on the secret that communication and speaking is an incredibly powerful tool, and everyone can get good at it. Everyone, no matter how nervous you are, no matter how scared you are, everyone can do it, and there’s super easy ways to start, and that once you start to harness that, your confidence builds, and it it goes through every single thing that you do as a founder. And so I really wish that people kind of understood that secret, because so many people are just terrified, right of getting up there where they think I’m just not going to do a good job. It is. Such an incredible tool. So that’s, that’s the secret. Everyone can do it. You just kind of have to get started with it. And you can find great resources everywhere to do that.

Scott Ritzheimer

It’s so true, and it’s so often, that when we’re we face a new skill, we have the tendency to recoil back and think, oh, I don’t know how to do that, right? So you didn’t know how to walk one day. You didn’t know how to talk at all one day, you know? And and I think you’ve laid such a clear and compelling narrative that this is just a skill that we can learn and do. It is a skill that we need to hone. And I love that folks are sitting listening, and everybody this is resonating. They want to hone it. They need help doing it. How can they find more out about you and the work that you do?

Laurie Gilbertson

Sure? Well, there are a couple ways to connect with me. The best way is to do that on my website and my website, which I’m sure you’ll put in your show notes. It’s www.tribecablueconsulting.com. Tribeca is the neighborhood I used to live in in New York City before I moved out here to Denver and blue because when I started my company, and I didn’t know what I wanted to do, I just got in and got a name, and Tribeca consulting was already taken, so I had to throw something else in there. So blue consulting, it’s very long, but I’ve kept it. You can connect with me there, and in the next few weeks, I’m going to be putting up a resource up on the website that’s going to be an assessment. And it’s just a super easy assessment, to figure out where you are in your communications journey. What are kind of your strengths, what are some things that you want to improve on? And you can go right on there and take the assessment, and hopefully that will make a lot of people feel a lot more comfortable getting started. You can also connect with me on LinkedIn and there as well. And I’m going to be starting a video series soon. That’s my top 10 tips for public speaking. So another super easy way to improve your speaking.

Scott Ritzheimer

Fantastic. Laurie, amazing. Loved having you on the show. Love diving into this. Just some really, really stellar insights. Thank you so much for being on just a pleasure having you. And for those of you watching and listening, you know your time and attention mean the world to us. I hope you got as much out of this conversation as I know I did, and I cannot wait to see you next time. Take care.

Contact Laurie Gilbertson

Laurie Gilbertson is a former New York City sex crimes and organized crime prosecutor, television legal analyst, educator, and entrepreneur. As the founder of Tribeca Blue Consulting, she coaches professionals on communicating with clarity, confidence, and creativity in their public speaking, presentations, trial work, and media appearances. Laurie works with clients to develop their personal and professional narratives, discover and hone their unique presentation styles, and craft and curate the stories that keep their audiences listening and wanting to learn more.

Want to learn more about Laurie Gilbertson’s work at Tribeca Blue Consulting? Check out her website at https://www.tribecablueconsulting.com/

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